My done and doing list
In light of my recent narcissism I’ve decided to make a pro/con list… about myself. I care almost as little as you, I assure you, but it fills some space. Some will be physical, some psychological, some trade traits, intelligence, and so forth.
Pro
- I like my eyes
- I like my hands. They’re kind of soft but I hardly count that as a bad thing. I’m not a fucking cowboy. They’re still strong and very large.
- I’m very logical. Even if my process doesn’t make sense to some people, my conclusions are always valid and often beyond the capabilities of most people
- I can follow Plato and Socrates. And enjoy it. And contribute. Freaky, I know.
- My hair is extremely thick. The color is nice enough and I have no dandruff, greasiness, etc.
- My elbows aren’t dry. I’m starting to realize how rare that is in guys… and dry elbows are disgusting. And no, before you ask, I’ve never used lotion.
- I pride myself on acting like me, no matter what the situation. I come off as odd to new people, but the ones that filter through like me that much more when they finally come to understand me.
- I built my own computer with absolutely no knowledge of how to do so. Sure it’s just cord A -> slot A nowadays but for 9 years now I’ve been working on hardware issues with absolutely no help and I fucking win every time. I’m proud of that.
- My priorities rock.
- Pragmatism, I think, is one of my strong suits. It makes it so that I have to accept the bad with the good. I recognize my superiority in many cases, but I also am constantly striving to better myself in those areas I am weak. All the areas that I am weak.
- I can focus or broaden my mind whenever it suites me. So while at work I may have to focus on what’s at hand to get the job done, in more leisurely times I can also follow some little thought off on a tangent that will become an extensive philosophy.
- I can do anything I put my mind to. I know that’s so cliche but I’ve proven it’s true for me. Anything in the world I feel I genuinely want to do, I can, and eventually better than anyone.
- I’m good at sports
- I’m good at computer games
- I’m good at card and board games. Seriously, really good at them. Mind you, that may just be me growing up in a Mormon society. Too often these games are based in deceit… and well, that’s not exactly a Mormon speciality.
- I can be completely compassionate or uncaring. Whichever I want, whenever I want. It makes me feel a little inhuman though, being able to turn it on and off.
- There’s probably more, but I don’t want to go into specifics when this post could turn out waaaay too long.
Cons
- I think my head is misshapen. Nobody has ever told me so, but it seems like it to me.
- I can never find any long-term motivation to work out. I’m on my best streak so far but I’ve faded to working out maybe 2-3 days a week instead of the 5 I need to.
- I’m extremely pale. I’ve come to accept that seeing as there’s a history of cancer in my family and I have no desire to tempt fate.
- I do something wrong with girls. I don’t know what. Seriously, I analyze my actions more than you can possibly know and I can’t pinpoint what I apparently do wrong. I no longer see myself as needy, I don’t lack confidence, while I think I can be boring I can’t see that I’m more boring than the next guy. The only conclusion I’m able to reach is that I really am simply setting my attraction standard too high. Maybe I’m overreaching my boundaries. The one thing I’ve never been able to determine is if I’m attractive or not. I just… don’t know. It’s like I’m so familiar with my face that I can’t analyze it. It’s like judging your mom’s physical characteristics. It just doesn’t work.
- I’m awful at math. That seems contradictory to my pro of logic, but that’s just how it is. I think it’s because while I’m logical, I’m not precise. Mathematics are all about getting the exact number, while I often go with “good enough”.
- My voice might be annoying. I’m not sure.
- I waste a lot of time and I slack off. I’m getting better at that but it’s a little sad.
- I am not a douschebag to girls I date. In fact, I could be described at a traditional romantic. Not to the extent that I lack humor but I automatically open doors for women, I would go out of my way to keep them from harm, I give them as much attention to their opinions as I would to anyone else (more, usually). It’s at times like this I remember the line from the film Waiting, “Girls like assholes. Women like confidence.” But then I think, holy shit, at the age of 21, according to that line, everyone around me is still a little girl! When exactly are they supposed to grow the fuck up?
- Wait, crap, that was a pro. Whatever, I’m not moving it.
- I’m living with my parents again. Dammit I’m sad.
- Sometimes I’m an asshole to people. Not on purpose… they simply just expect me to care about their problems and I don’t. I don’t share my problems with anyone else. After all, they’re mine and nobody else is going to fix them. Why burden them with unnecessary stress, and why bother me with theirs?
- I’m often too blunt. Tact is not a foreign concept to me yet as I grow, I find I care less and less about filtering my dialogue.
- I have terrible allergies for about 2 months per year. It pisses me off horribly.
- I’ve never tried alcohol or drugs of any kind. I’m not saying I wish to become like that; simply that it seems like a disappointment that at the age of 21, I haven’t tried. My excuse for it? I haven’t had a reason to yet. Or closer to home, as far as they’re currently available, the con’s outweigh the pros.
- I watch too much TV, too many movies, read too many books and play too many videogames. There, I said it and I won’t ever say it again.
- I’m so damn jaded. Blame the internet. On a related note, go to the encyclopediadramatica and search for “Offended”. Fortunately I’m not that fucked up. The chans are pushing me there though.
- I’m hypocritical, although I wouldn’t call it that. I mean come on… if we both have the same problem, I criticize you for that problem, and you criticize me for being hypocritical because I also have the problem, it doesn’t erase the fact that you’re still a douschebag.
- I argue with my mother a lot. I know she’s intelligent in her own way but I just can’t agree with her on anything and I’m not sure why. What scares me more is that they say you will treat your spouse like you treat your mother… I can find reasons why that wouldn’t be true, particularly in my case, but that psychological analysis could have valid reasoning and I might find it to be true despite myself. When it comes down to it though, I just have to work away from that result and I can beat it.
And again, that’s the point of this list… if I know my shortcomings, I can beat them. Having it written out like this will make it easier to remember and I’m going to go to sleep for my meeting with a school advisor tomorrow, bye.
My opinion, does it count?
The first thing we need to do, I think, is define the difference between whore websites (myspace, facebook etc.) and blogging. You can blog on myspace but let’s face it… you’re there because the 2613 people on your friends list make you feel like you matter, discounting of course the fact that 2612 of them don’t know or care who you are as long as your picture is gracing their own ego trips somewhere on page 53.
Blogs are a different kind of ego trip. The mentality that what you say is relevant at all. 999 times out of 1000 it’s not. Most bloggers are cookie cutter pastries of society saying what millions before them have already said better and to greater effect. Are mine different?
What have I written about? Reviews mostly. Places I go, stories I hear, people I meet. Please keep in mind though that my blog was never intended to be original or inspiring or even remotely interesting to the casual passerby. It was created so that if somebody already, or wishing to be, a part of my life, would like to know about me, they were given this option. Since I am far more articulate at writing than speaking, it seems to me the best way. Particularly since I loathe repeating myself, even when it’s about myself. So are my blogs important or meaningful? No, not to anyone who doesn’t already care. Maybe I’ll change that later, but for now I have little unique to bring to the table.
This does however bring to light the question: Am I as big an egotistical douschebag as the rest of you? Yes and no. Nobody who knows me will ever praise me for my humility. Nor should they. If a person is humble, they are either insignificant or lying. A waste of time. I have strong traits and while I don’t linger on them, I’m certainly not humble. Take my classes for example. In any class I’ve taken to date, I am more intelligent regarding that subject than any other person in that class. I don’t gloat about it (<—that wasn’t gloating, it was speculating) and on top of that, I realize that I am probably considerably more lazy than the majority of said people in most of those classes. So what does that make me? Egotistical or humble? Pragmatic, perhaps? Except that I’ll be first to point out examples of myself being quite irrational. Few and far between, but they happen. Or does that make me even more pragmatic to admit that?
Hmm, okay, trailed off a bit at the end there; whatever. Point is, my opinion does not count, but it still carries more weight than most of yours because mine actually have the potential to count because I’m a more intelligent person. Done.
Hmm, was that egotistical or pragmatic? I love combinations.
My degree: To edit or not to edit
I’ve changed my major… let’s see… 1,2… 4 times so far.
Psychology – I finally realized that while I’m good at analyzing behavior and so forth, I’d just be awful at helping people with their problems. I simply don’t care about them.
Journalism – Too many rules. Writing is fun but there’s so much bullshit you have to sift through that it’s just not worth it and in the end you get to express little-to-no creativity for your efforts.
Cullinary Arts – No.
Law Enforcement – I’m not really sure what I was thinking here. It’s entirely possible that I came to this decision after playing Rainbow 6: Vegas or something. How’s that for bullshit psychology? 
And finally, my current focus: Video editing. So far, out of all my choices, this seems to fit the best. It’s always been apparent that I should be doing something with computers but I sucked at programming, was awesome at web design but they get paid in peanuts, have a small bit of artistic talent but not enough for current gen gaming or animation, and nearly pull my hair out every time I handle networking. Editing though has brought a new opportunity to my eyes. I get to use a computer for my job almost exclusively, average salary is over 60k, my creativity is exercised and I would get to freaking make movies. I mean, come on. Who doesn’t dream of making movies?
O.K. so, because I’m bored, I’m going to make a pro/con list:
Pro’s:
- Good pay
- Fun
- Computer oriented
- I get to make movies!
- Past experience with video editing has been satisfactory
- Useful knowledge outside of a work environment as well
- I get to know famous actors and directors and producers and such
- etc.
Con’s:
- Expenses:
- My Macbook will cost around 2 thousand bucks which I’ve got to buy within the next few months.
- My video editing software will be another 1500 to 2500 dollars depending on what I get
- I’ve become so bored with the idea of a career and bored with my current job that how do I know I’m not just accepting the first slightly interesting path that comes along recently? It’s not like some light has just popped on in my head thinking, “Brilliant! Video editing! Why didn’t I think of this before?!” I honestly don’t believe that there’s a job out there that would be a perfect match for me, so… maybe this is as close as I get?
- I’m a whiny bitch, I know. I’m hardly the only one with occupational woes, this career will make good money and open great opportunities for me. Which is why I’m doing it. Hopefully this one works out.
Film Review: Spring…
No, “Spring” is not a movie. Spring is infact a season. A bad, bad season for movies. It’s like the directors see all the award ceremonies end and suddenly they don’t give a fuck anymore. I figure movies can be made for 3 different reasons (or so I will lead you to believe for the sake of this post). Money, artistic achievement, and acknowledgment for artistic achievement. Not in that order.
Money comes foremost, because if movies didn’t make money, nobody would spend the money to make movies. Simple enough. Acknowledgment comes second and artistic value comes third and is greatly ignored. I wouldn’t generally make such a pessimistic remark, but you guys kind of forced me to it with such a stony apathy about the quality of your post-ceremony productions.
A quick summary of my recent movies:
Doomsday: 2/10 Worst movie i’ve seen since Alexander. Plot holes are one thing and can be ignored for the sake of action. Plot contradictions are something else. Did the survivors-gone-canabal-due-to-an-exhausted-food-supply just… overlook the five thousand motherfucking cows two miles outside the city?
Leatherheads: 6/10 Mediocre on all counts. It was enjoyable enough, but I find that three days later I can’t recall a single specific scene… nor the actual plot… nor any of the actors besides George Clooney! I’m half convinced that I never even saw this movie. From what I can remember of it, it seems I only ever saw the preview.
The Forbidden Kingdom: 7/10 Also meh. Putting Jackie Chan and Jet Li together in a single film should have been the most momentuous event to happen since Tom Cruise recieved his superpowers. Instead the story was based on a white kid who travels back in time to free the monkey king… I hate you people. Action sequences were a bit tame compared to most modern eastern martial arts films and they didn’t happen frequently enough. Too much focus on the retard white kid with the perfect triangle of chest hair.
*On a related note, what the hell is with all the Shia LaBeouf lookalikes popping up?
National Treasure 2 (whatever the hell the subtitle is… I dunno): 7/10 Good, not great. I’m no Native American history major but… El Dorado the city of gold in South Dakota? Correct me if I’ve wrong, but doesn’t that seems a… few thousand miles off? Whatever.
27 dresses: ?/10 I do not remember this movie… only that I did in fact see it. It keeps blurring together with previews for Made of Honor.
21: high 7/10 Actually a pretty good movie. It wasn’t ground breaking material but I don’t think it was made to be. A fun little film that you can add on a to-do list for a day off.
Vantage Point: 6/10 I can’t even imagine a method of storytelling to make me care less about the characters. But at any rate it did fit together and there was a very good car chase scene… even if all of the plot twists were borderline retarded.
Altogether, a very dull season. Summer shows some promise though.
Sansa
Hey look, I got a kitty.
This is Sansa, my beautiful new kitty that I saved from an Animal Shelter in Murray. She loves me.
Restaurant Review: Gloria’s Little Italy
Ok so, this ones proooobably not going to help many people because it’s local. But it’s also the best damn italian food I’ve ever had. Located at 300S. 279E. Provo, UT, Little Italy needs more business. Which is why i’m writing this review. Because a place with food this good cannot shut down.
When first walking into Little Italy you look around in confusion because at first glance it looks like an extremely tiny ice cream shop. This turns out to be their selection of Gillato and is just one feature. Asking to eat, they take you down a short flight of stairs into their dining area, small, with about ten to fifteen tables. Perusing through the menu you can order one of their “meals” or mix and match your own noodles and sauce. In addition to the standard italian pastas they’ve also got an extensive list of Panini sandwiches.
After consuming the best Italian food of your life, go back upstairs and have a look at their desert and gillato selections. Featuring extremely thick and moist chocolate cake and Italian Creme every one of their deserts is worth a second or third try.
I’ve eaten there so far on a couple occasions and it’s been completely empty both times. Granted, once was at around 5p.m. and then again at 3p.m. which are not exactly peak hours, but it does imply that you probably aren’t going to sit through a long wait, despite it’s limited space.
Now, this isn’t Chili’s and it isn’t fast food. This place is good and it isn’t going to come as cheap. For one meal plus desert it’s probably going to hit for over 20 bucks. Not the worst price ever though, considering the food. To those in Utah reading this, go eat there, now. I command you!
Little Italy rolls up a 10/10
p.s. I’ve heard wonderful things about their cheese.
